Long Hair

This was from my Hair Length Experiment. After discovering that hair follicles have active and dormant cycles that are determined by your genes, I wanted to find out what my maximum hair length is. Sometime during the dormant period of the hair follicle, that hair falls out. Lucky for us, the cycles are staggered so we don't go bald. Everyone has different cycle periods, so not everyone can grow head hair down to their butts. The rest of the follicles on our bodies have shorter cycles too which is why we are not as hairy as our ape cousins. The scientists that figured this out, did so by knocking out the cycle gene in mice and wound up with mice with very long hair. They were pretty funny looking too.
Armed with all this information, I figured that if I bleached my hair and waited for all the bleached strands to fall out, then my entire head would have gone through at least one cycle and my hair would be at its maximum length. It didn't get any longer than what you see in this photo, but eventually it was all dark brown after the orange strands had all fallen out. This experiment drove me crazy but I was determined to find out. I don't know how people can live their whole lives with hair like that. After declaring the experiment over, I cut it all off and donated it to Lock-of-Love.

"Now that I've shared this affair of the hair, I think I'll repair to my lair and use Nair - do you care?" - George Carlin, from the hair poem.