Reasons why you would want to spend 336 hours with me :) (Includes a question!)

Hello everyone! My name is Sam and I am relatively new here. I created an account a little while back but I found everything here a tad confusing. If I am posting this in the wrong place, forgive me! I had a burning question for Rhett and Link, and whadda ya know, there is a category for it!

Let me start off with a little back story...

My mother is a psychopath.

There I said it. This woman was crazy in love with Paul McCartney. Through a system of deviant schemes, she mapped out his usual locations, booked concert tickets, climbed over massive concrete pillars, barbed wire, security guards etc. and finally got to meet the man of her dreams while hiding up in the rafters of a parking garage he was inside of. Not to mention winning the choice between 1000 dollars or Paul McCartney concert tickets for painting his face on the sidewalk using nothing but her body. needless to say, she did not become 500 dollars richer that day.

My mother was also a liar.

After accidentally winning air time on national radio for fibbing about how she loved serving Internationale "less fortunate" college students, mom was forced to beg and plead that the administration for Internationale exchange students at her college let her borrow 20-30 "asian looking" people in hopes to fool the station that was headed to meet her.

They did.

The reason I am exploiting my mom's teen years is that... well... she told me too. Today at dinner we were talking about internships and I jokingly said that it would be awesome to Intern with Rhett and Link (my favorite YouTubers). She did not take this as a joke. I tried to get her to understand that there is no way those two prodigies are going let some kid on the other end of the US (NC to be specific) hang with them for two weeks. To that, my mom replied "Why not? you aren't hard to take care of, all you do is sleep and eat bacon!" ...thanks mom.

I told mom this idea was crazy but she reminded me of all the crazy things she did that ended up working, so I thought I would give it a shot! I decided to compose 10 reasons why I would make a great intern, I can assure you I do more than sleep and eat bacon!

1. I can take care of kids - With two extremely busy men like yourselves, you guys deserve a break. Maybe a date night with the wife-ies. Feel free to drop the kids off with me, because nothing says trust like letting a random 16 year old watch your little bundles of joy!

2. I can cook - well by cook, I mean microwave. I am kind of what they call a meat-atarian. I can make a mean bacon wrapped hotdog like you wouldn't believe.

3. I get stuff done - Need somebody to make a doughnut run? How about a nice heated 12 glaze box from Krsipy Kreme. Serve that up with some texas pete and enjoy a little slice of North Carolina. Maybe wash it down with a little cheerwine?

4. I dont take up much space - lets be honest, I need a place to stay. I was thinking say 25 bucks a night on Rhett's couch. If a stayed for two weeks, that total up to... 350 dollars.... not too shabby.

5. On a more serious note, I have dreams of being like you guys!  YouTube is where I spend a good bit of my life. I have recently obtained a great high end pc and a lot of gear to get started making my own videos. I always love watching Good Mythical Morning and studying what makes it so great. I am hoping some of it's greatness will rub off on my videos as well.

6.  My mom graduated from NC State. GO PACK!

7. Rhett and Link have replied to me 3 times on Google+, so we are practically bffs now.

8. I love you... need I say more?

9. I would cover the costs - Im not asking to be your adopted son, this is strictly business! 

10. You wont be disappointed - I know that this whole post has been rather half serious, but in all honestly, I can work hard. Mom put herself out there and awesome things resulted. Now I certainly am not going to throw my body on the ground and paint your faces with it (unless you want me to), but I have big goals in life and would love to learn from the guys that have been fueling these dreams since I first discovered the channel in 2009.

Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this, especially if it was Rhett and Link. I don't want to make this all about me though. If you think you would make an awesome intern for Rhat and Link, please share why! I would love to here from you all. That way I can know who actually read this and who read 3 lines and then proceeded to tell me how stupid I was for posting this.

So Rhett and Link... Whadda ya say? Feel up to the challenge? I encourage you to think on it. You never know what could happen. Best of wishes to everyone,

-Sam, The Gorilla Mule.

EDIT: If you guys say no, a big ol' Chuck Testa Noooooope would be awesome ;)