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Home of Rhett & Link fans - the Mythical Beasts!

I doubt anyone will read this or if you do, that you'll like it, but this is a short story that I wrote in less than half an hour and I was hoping maybe some of you out there could tell me what you thought of it.

Luke and the Gray World

Luke sat on a park bench. Everything around him was bustling, kids playing,
parents talking, people playing with their dogs. It was truly a
beautiful day. Green grass, green leaves, a colorful playground,
everyone happy, and a giant... Gray sky. Just hanging there. He looked
up at it again. Everything was perfect but the sky didn't fit. The sky
never fit. Even the place smelled perfect. Like a sweet spring breeze
carries the flower's blessing, but up in the sky there was only a dull,
depressing and oddly frightening look. It was hard to turn away, but he
had to. He held flowers in his hands, not a bouquet but just a few he'd
collected. The blue, plastic bench was comfortable and the wind brushed
through his short blond hair. He looked down towards the road to his
left. There was something coming, something good.


That sky, it was ruining everything. No. Don't look at the sky. He looked to
his right, just seeing people, smiles. Back to the left, and there was a
school bus. Children. He loved children. Their smiles, their innocence.
They were just pure, happy humans. Not usually as afraid to speak their
mind but less likely to be profane. They began getting off and running
into the park. He smiled and watched. All kinds, American, European,
African, Asian, even a few... Gray. No. That can't be right. There
aren't gray people. It was a girl, she had no smile. The little girl
wasn't dressed for play, she had a little dress, brown and striped. She
reminded him of someone coming out of a relaxed Catholic school. And she
was not running and playing, she was walking. Slowly. She looked down
at the ground, hiding some of her face. Tears rolled down her cheeks and
she looked very sad. A boy ran past her. But as he got close to her,
she twisted her shoe slightly and tripped him, causing him to fall. He
hit the ground and scraped himself. His father rushed over and pat him
on the back. "It's alright. Just a scrape. Wash it off and it won't even
hurt anymore. Come on." They went off, smiling. Normal. But there was
that girl.


And the sky. The girl and the sky. They didn't fit. "Why? Why are you
here?" She stopped, hearing his voice. She didn't look at him, but began
to sob with her tears. A gentle cry, as if she had just done something
wrong and her mother had yelled at her. She turned from him, and looked
out across the street. There was a man. A gray man. He wore a suit and
was quite bald. He waved to Luke, turned and began to walk away, shoving
a man into the street as he went. Luke looked back at the sky. The gray
was starting to spread. It was going from the sky to the horizon as
well. Everyone had stopped playing. There were no happy noises anymore.
Luke looked back at the girl, only to find she was much closer, now
crying quite violently, but silently. "Why do you do this? What have I
done that makes you not want me to be here?"


The sound returned to her, her cries and sobs horrible. Her long, dark hair
hung down in front of her face now as she went on, still hiding it.
"Yo... You can't have wh-wh-what you th-think you n-n-n-n-n-n-need." She
gasped for control and slowed herself, still with tears and heavy
breath. She turned and looked at where the man had been and started
again, stronger than ever. "IT'S NOT RIGHT FOR YOU TO HAVE!"


Her scream silenced everything. It wanted to echo, but was too afraid to.
She looked at him, but he could not see her face behind the hair. "I
created it. I'm not keeping it from anyone else, they just don't want
it. It's not my fault they do not accept. I do not ask for riches or
flesh or the sins or the temptations of most men. I just want to sit
here, enjoying life, seeing every plant green, every child happy, every
parent content and the sky blue. I just want a blue sky. Is that too
much to ask?" His eyes pleaded with her, but he wasn't even sure if she
could see them. Not sure that he had really said anything. He reached
forth and moved the hair out of her eyes. She was very beautiful,
Caucasian and the sweetest thing you could ever see.


She stared deep into his eyes. "You can't have perfection. The world
doesn't allow it. My family brings reality to your world. I bring
reality to you. It is not my choice, it is my duty. For nothing can be
perfect and nothing should. Even if all you ask for is everyone else to
be happy, that cannot be. Even if you ask for nothing for yourself, that
cannot be. Every wish is selfish in one way or another. And you chose
to realize that and leave before it was too late. Or maybe, you just
couldn't live with reality." She left his body, limp as soon as he
touched her. She walked, her black shoes clacking loudly against the
gray sidewalk. There was a man, crying and holding a boy by the
bathroom. There was a crowd in the street where a man had stumbled and
been hit by a car. And there was no little girl and man. Like they never
existed. And the only one who knew of them, the creator of this little
paradise, he too was gone now. As the world was left to crumble and it
too ceased to exist.


© November 18, 2010 Jerad A. C. Peckham (Walt. J. Rimmer)

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Comment by Ben Shultz (one wheeled shark) on December 3, 2010 at 3:42pm
Whoa, deep. good job!

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